


Loving You Was A Losing Game

by tsumtsumii



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Konoha Akinori-centric, Konoha is a good wingman, Light Angst, M/M, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love, kinda inspired from my own life i guess lmao, letting go, very short fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-26
Updated: 2020-05-26
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:49:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24393796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tsumtsumii/pseuds/tsumtsumii
Summary: He had always believed that 'If he's happy, then I'm happy'.But honestly, he's not.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji & Bokuto Koutarou & Konoha Akinori, Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Akaashi Keiji/Konoha Akinori
Comments: 3
Kudos: 73





	Loving You Was A Losing Game

There was a time Konoha desperately believed that he could worm his way into Akaashi's heart, even though just a little.

The setter was gentle, and caring in his own unique way. His eyes were a beautiful hue of blue, his cheeks flush with a rosy pink, and his curly raven hair complimented him so well. If he had to describe Akaashi in one word, "handsome" wasn't the best way to put it. "Pretty" was more suited for a man who was as angelic as Akaashi Keiji. At first he liked his looks, but as the younger man grew beside him as a teammate, he saw more and more to him. He was clever, and his words were obviously well chosen and thought of. He cared for the team and is probably the best at managing the tiresome man-baby that is Bokuto Koutarou.

The very moment Akaashi joined their team, Bokuto started hogging him around, making those dumb excuses like 'I want to practice spikes' or 'I need help with something'. It wasn't a bother a first, but as time past, the desire to take Bokuto's place grew and grew. Even though he just saw Akaashi as someone attractive, and didn't want to call it as something subjective as 'like', there were those itching moments where he would think, "Ah, I'd like to spend time with him too". Soon enough, the spiker and setter duo started hanging out more often, to the point one would say that their friendship was in another level of bonding and trust. 

It annoyed him.

Was it still attraction? Can it even be called that way, now?

Konoha scratched his head, sighed, and let his head lie onto his desk.

***

The days had passed since the first time he had finally admitted to himself that he was indeed crushing on Akaashi. The spring came, and he and his teammates watched the third years pass their batons to them. Akaashi was incredibly prettier as he grew from a first year to a second year. Sometimes, he thinks it's just because of how Akaashi looks stunning in his eyes, but no, it was a reality and even his teammates know it.

"Did Akaashi take on a skin care routine or something? He glowed up in one year!" he heard Komi say once. No doubt, Akaashi became even flawless as a second year, to the point you could take a picture of him in any angle WHILE playing volleyball, and he'd still look damn good. It's hard to not fall for him, even on looks alone. Girls left and right, even some guys talk about him, about that one pretty setter in the volleyball club. Bokuto seemed unfazed.

"Akaashi is Akaashi. Who said looks would define who you really are?" Their captain says, as he leaned onto the setter. He gave the other a big, hearty smile, one that made his eyes turn into small crescents. 

"That idiot actually can say something..." Konoha says, trailing off to look at Akaashi.

Ah damn, that expression on his face was priceless.

_Too bad it wasn't because of him._

***

It was a particularly boring Friday afternoon in the autumn when he had realized that the only spark of excitement in his life was trying to become someone else's.

He remembers the time, it was around three, at the rooftop of the school. He sat there, head tilted upwards to watch the light, fluffy clouds move with the autumn breeze. His crush was at his side, fiddling with his long, slender fingers. Akaashi's eyes were planted onto the concrete floor, and his face shone a bright hue of red. The silence was long, and heavy for Konoha, so after shutting his brain for a moment to catch a breather, he smiled to his spark, his happiness. "Why don't you confess to Bokuto then? I'm sure he likes you back"

"He's simple-minded, and his brain is probably just full of volleyball. I'm pretty sure I have no room there"

_'Yeah, just like how I don't have room in...'_

Konoha gave the younger a pat on the shoulder, a sign of reassurance that no matter what happens, he'll be there for him, and that he could come up to him whenever he needed help. Then there was a smile on Akaashi's lips, exactly what he was after. He wanted to see the man he likes to smile, to be happy. He believed that if Akaashi was happy, then naturally he'd be happy too, and that when Akaashi smiles, he would be capable to smile as well. So he helped his precious friend, giving advises here and there, and making the other feel comforted whenever he felt sad. Konoha wished it would stay like this, that he was actually real close with him, that he was the one Akaashi leaned on when he felt bad, and that he was more than just a random teammate and friend of his.

It had come to the point they would even start texting each other often, platonic sharing of "good morning"s and "good night"s. He knew more about Akaashi now, his interests, his favorite onigiri shop, his small hobbies aside playing volleyball. It had given him a false hope, that maybe, just maybe... Akaashi might forget Bokuto and just be his instead. And thus the days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into a month or two. The soft interactions were long gone, now replaced with Akaashi's bitter tears, a broken heart he had broken himself, and sweet lies Konoha had desperately bitten into.

Akaashi completely believed he'd never have a chance with Bokuto. If he was bold enough, he would've told the him, "You have a chance with me". But he wasn't. Still, he held onto his small talks with the other, convincing that if he just tried, that even though it's slow and steady, Akaashi might slowly come to like him. 

Ah and just when Konoha wanted to sweep Akaashi off of his feet and take him just to be his, a familiar scene plays out.

"So, you like Akaashi...?"

***

A smile. That was what he was after. He loved it when Akaashi smiles, and he loved it when it was him who makes Akaashi smile.

But those days were long gone. He had always believed that 'If he's happy, then I'm happy'. If he was honest, if he was given at least a chance to speak his mind, say what he actually felt, then no, he wasn't happy at all. The smile on Akaashi's face, he wanted it to disappear. For the first time, he didn't want him to smile, he didn't want Akaashi to look so happy. He didn't want Akaashi to hug him either, whispering a thousand thanks for dealing with him. It was like he was going to be thrown away now. Now that his problems were solved, he's now going to stay behind all by himself? Alone?

No, he brought this upon himself. He was the one who volunteered to help. He was the one who offered Akaashi a shoulder to lean on. He knew that the day would come that he wouldn't offer it to him anymore, that the day would come he wouldn't need to give advice nor tell him everything will be okay. He knew it for so long, but he denied it. It's not Akaashi's fault he's now sobbing onto his pillow, brokenhearted as he bid his one sided love a farewell. Earlier, Bokuto and Akaashi revealed they were already dating. Akaashi and Bokuto thanked him the most, that without his help, they wouldn't be together. And like the usual, he smiled, and congratulated them.

He was an idiot.

He was an idiot for holding onto his own sweet lies of hope desperately. He lied to himself, he lied he had a chance when it was clear that he didn't. He lied that he was happy, he lied to himself that he would be okay, and what a number of lies it was, only to come crashing onto him, dragging him down to earth with just three words that left Akaashi's mouth. 

_Too bad it was for Bokuto._

So Konoha, being the supportive friend, wiped his tears away.

***

There was a time Konoha desperately believed that he could worm his way into Akaashi's heart, even though just a little.

It had been years since then, when his cold winter was bathed with the hot, stinging tears trickling down his cheeks. The spring had returned, and the flowers were blooming. It felt like it was just yesterday, when he had greeted his pretty friend, wearing that dark blue shirt that identifies him as a member of the volleyball club. Now, he was standing, wearing a gorgeous suit, a dark blue tuxedo to match the theme. Old friends, acquaintances and some people he didn't know was around him, smiling and clapping, sharing this joyous moment with them. He clapped, loud enough to keep him from going back. He had to stay strong, if he wasn't, then that wouldn't be the Konoha Akinori they know.

He looked at Akaashi who was beaming, a very evident blush spreading across his face, along with that beautiful smile of his. The man laughed, Bokuto was hugging from behind, smothering him with kisses and all the love he could give him. It was a sight to behold, and he was thankful to had witnessed this. Akaashi turned to Konoha, mouthing a "Thank you" with his lips, before flashing him with the prettiest smile. He loved him, and even until now, he was still weak to that sparkling smile of his. He raised his glass, returned the smile, and said:

"Cheers to the newlyweds!"


End file.
